This week has been all together different than my previous weeks here. Happiness and peace have settled upon me and I am finding my place here. I have found my rhythm, my stride and I’m finding my people. If I’m being honest, I don’t know exactly what caused the shift but I am over the moon happy about the choices Jarrett and I have made and the life we are settling into.
I feel as though, perhaps, what has changed is my doubt. My concern. My worry. The constant nagging feeling of whether or not this was the right choice for us. I’ve stopped worrying and leaned in. I am embracing this life and I love it. Sometimes, it’s our own resistance, more than anything else that holds us back. Jarrett said yesterday, “I love your persona this week.” I laughed and smiled and replied, I’m back aren’t I? Amanda, has returned to herself.
The most difficult part of change is the unknown. It’s hard to step forward in the darkness when you cannot see around the curve. And you wonder how long it will be before even a pinhole of light reveals that you have indeed made the right decision. Friends, you will never be sure, and you will never be ready. There truly are no guarantees. Sometimes we have to step into the dark and walk without the light that reveals whether or not this is right. Sometimes we just have to go. Sometimes, we need to stumble around in the dark for awhile and trust things we can’t yet see.
This experience has taught me so many valuable things, one of the most powerful is go before you’re ready. If you wait until you are ready you will never leave. Change is a beautiful, powerful thing. It’s needed and necessary. It keeps us growing, learning, and humble. Lean forward and go sweet friends, you’ve got this. Much love and courage sweet friends.
