I am currently reading Undistracted by Bob Goff. I love his books, but that’s a story for another time. I am a few chapters into this one and I appreciate his fresh perspective. My choosing to start this book was very timely. Jarrett and I had a conversation this weekend and I shared with him how much I felt owned by other areas of my life, pulled in too many directions all at once. As far back as I can remember I have always felt such a huge sense of responsibility for everything and everyone.
Yesterday, in my reading, Bob said, ”stop asking permission for things you already have permission to do.” I laughed out loud at myself. I always want to have permission and approval to do things but the truth is I don’t need them. I already have permission and approval. He also said, ”you will only be as free as you actually think you are.” That one hit me right between the eyes. So much of the restriction in our lives is self made. The only person holding us hostage is the person we see in the mirror.
I appreciate expectations, feedback and guidelines within which to work. I prefer freedom to navigate things the way I need to, but I want an outline of what you expect of me. My expectations for myself are very high and often unrealistic at least in timeline. I am a very high achieving person and that can be difficult to turn off. My sweet husband truly doesn’t need me to cook him a meal from scratch each night but I think that’s what a ”good” wife does. Truthfully, my cooking a good meal or not does not change my status as a good wife, that comes from how we love.
Today, take a little time to evaluate your sense of freedom. Do you feel obligated to other people all the time? Do you only do what you think others require of you? How much of that burden and expectation is actually self imposed? Has anyone ever actually said to you that you have to work all the time? Show up for everything? Stay until the last person is gone? Be cautious of the restrictions you place on yourself or you’ll find you’ve placed yourself in a box. Surround yourself with people who want to see you free and unrestricted. Fully engage the world around you and re-engage that passion you left behind in the name of all these rules. Much love and freedom sweet friends.
