I’m growing tired of the polish. The shine. The filter. The front. The fake smiles and the ”I’m great how are you!” When did great become the norm? When did everyone start pretending like life was easy? When did we stop being honest with each other? Why are we all wearing masks? What are we so afraid of?
We live in a world of oversharing. Everyone seems to be so comfortable putting their business out there. But we are more disconnected than ever before. We are lonely and isolated, because we aren’t being honest. We aren’t letting our guards down long enough to be vulnerable, and without that vulnerability we can’t have connection. We are putting out the edited version. Mostly, we are filtering photos and gushing about how wonderful our lives are. We have lost our ability to truly be vulnerable with each other. We all seem a little afraid of the truth.
Sweet friends life is hard. And sometimes it isn’t. But always pretending like everything is great is not only exhausting but it’s not helpful. When we allow ourselves to be honest it normalizes that to other people. I can remember, years ago, one of my friends saying, ”you’re the only one of my friends that was ever honest with me about marriage.” Had I been married at the time? No. But I had seen the struggles my friends and family had gone through. My friends, marriage is hard. Because all good things are hard. No matter how much you love the person. You can be married to your most amazing soul mate and you’re still going to go through difficult times. It’s the nature of life. It doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong or that you married the wrong person. It’s life. It ebbs and flows. Marriage is also wonderful. There are times of pure bliss. But there are also disagreements over dishtowels and throw pillows.
During the NCAA Convention, I finally felt normal as an Athletic Director. For almost a year now, I have felt completely isolated and often overwhelmed. I didn’t know who to share these feelings with. During convention, several people shared their struggles with me and it was the most amazing breath of fresh air I’ve had in a long time. I am not alone in my struggles. Leadership roles are very lonely and isolating, but we are never truly alone in them. Hearing the truth of other people’s day to day makes yours feel a little less overwhelming.
I share this today to say, you are not alone my friends. You are not outside the norm. You are not doing it wrong. If you aren’t particularly happy today, know that tomorrow is a new day. Storms will come. Trials will come. But so will sunshine and so will the biggest wins of your life. Life is a journey, it ebbs and flows between hard times and easy times. Don’t make the hard times harder and relish in the easy times. Life is a beautiful gift, no matter the season you are in. Find the ones you can unmask with and journey on sweet friends.
